How hard can it be?

I got frustrated today with a bunch of stuff. I haven't had a lot of down time for just me lately and while i enjoy company, at some point I need a break. Thats just how it is with me.
In any case, I was thinking today how I always do when I am with a bunch of people and realize I need to be alone. I was thinking about how important we make small stuff, myself included. Appearance, personal preferences, etc get made into a bigger deal than they ought. I mean who am I to tell someone that their appearance is unclassy, prepped up, whatever. God looks at the inside, not the outside anyway. I can't think of a time Jesus made a comment about how someone was dressed. David danced in his underwear before God even! So why is it that we get hung up on such small things all the time? What is the basis for our unwritten Christian dresscode anyway? I understand the controversy over some verses in 1 Corinthians but I will say that I think that some in the Church take them out of context. I was once told by a bible teacher "to be dogmatic about things essential to salvation, and not dogmatic about those that don't assure salvation." Now I think I can safely say that the Bible is pretty clear that salvation is assured through confession of Christ as Lord, not by dress or by biblical interpretation. I don't wish for all men to hold the same interpretation of the Bible, I simply wish for all men and women in the Church to take the time to understand other opinions about non-salvation matters in God's Word. I also wish that as fellow members of the Church, we stop condemning eachother over matters that do seem a bit grey. And I include myself in that number who needs to be more understanding and less judgemental towards fellow believers in Christ Jesus.
We all know that God's Word brings life, but there are some that manipulate it to their desires to the point that it makes it hard for God's breath to reach man's souls. Legalism and separationism are very real threats to Church unity these days. Catholics, Presbyterians, Baptists, Non-denominational, all fall under Christ's authority. Lets start acting like there is truly one opinion that counts anymore, that being Christ's. It's a hard task to undertake, to truly understand other Christian viewpoints better, but I stand convicted of the need for more grace given.